The church of the Seventh Day Shopper
Has established a popular creed
As religions go, its a whopper
For those with a fervour to feed
Strategically placed, community based
And catering to every need.
A Minister waits at the entrance
Whose mission it is to greet
The hordes who turn out with a vengeance
Their sacred rites to complete
Lost in prayer, and unaware
As their trolleys run over your feet.
Any check-out disciples doubting
Or showing the signs of strain
Are offered a pilgrims outing
To retreats, in which to re-train
And after a while, re-emerge with a smile
And freshly laundered brain.
Religions with far less appeal
Where congregations are small
Could offer a similar deal
To those who answer the call
Like, after you`ve died, if not satisfied
A refund, no quibbles at all.
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